I am ultimately blessed: Jesus died for me. His grace has repeatedly forgiven me. I have lived decades beyond what I believed I would. Today, I have intentionally tailored my life to revolve around service to others, and more importantly, devotion to Him.
For the past decade, God has put me through intense fire to prepare me for His plan and purpose in these pivotal last days. He burned away much unholy in my life: wrong thinking, garbage ideals, and disastrous strongholds.
Christ is the great refiner. The moment I flattened myself before Him in full surrender, He began to purify every area of my mind and soul.
After ten years of scalding transformation, I authentically declare that He is successfully building His character in me. I imagine an eternity of character-building will be needed, but oh, how marvelous to see the metamorphosis taking place in my life. I have gone from a prisoner of helpless and hopeless to a peace and understanding beyond human comprehension. Where I was once tragically gripped in shame and fear, today my breathing comes freely and sleeping well comes easy.
I said, “Jesus, take all of me. I will daily die-to-self. I will break up with the world. Please just take this hot mess, and I will go wherever you send me. Forever.”
Along the way, He has endowed me with a jaw-dropping purified faith. Because I am all-in, I see His move upon this earth regularly. He is doing this. It is all Him. I am simply willing-to-be-willing.
Walking with Jesus is the single greatest treasure I experience. Abiding in His truth, care, and love is breathtaking. Even as the world melts in chaos around me, I have an other-worldly calm and peace of mind. I am all too aware that it only takes a moment for me to step outside of His protection. There are so many potential pitfalls and traps in my daily path: negative thinking, gossip, loose lips, judgment, frustration, self-righteous indignation, worry, and pride. If I find myself anxious or overwhelmed, I have likely let go of His hand and said, “Yeah, I think I will head over here on my own for a bit.”
I live in chronic pain from multiple sclerosis that affects my neurological health. Visual disorders and migraines are a part of my daily existence. I am also challenged with significant spinal and bone disease. I must adhere to a commitment of good nutrition, health, and exercise or I am debilitated. When I veer off course, I pay an agonizing penalty.
Similarly, I have a tenacious and intense Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD), that will send me to a dangerous, life-threatening place if I don’t manage it well. If you know my life story, you understand the physical, mental, and emotional trauma that I have overcome. If you are unaware, here is the . My trauma–affected brain does great when I follow a specific lifestyle. This includes plenty of down time, avoidance of toxic people, places, and things, as well as intentional reduction of other people’s drama. I surround myself with an amazing extended family known as the SayIt Community who regularly fellowship together. I also purposefully find reasons to insert humor into each day.
I counteract anxiety and uncertainty with gratitude. If you were a passenger in my car on the way to work each morning, not only would you hear a Dr. Tony Evans sermon blaring, but you would also hear me joyfully express thanks to Jesus for my abundant life (right down to the toothpaste on my toothbrush). One way I kick That Wily Devil in the shins is daily communion, morning prayer and scripture study, the armor of God, a sermon to and from work, and unceasing dialogue with Him.
Is my relentless pursuit of Him extreme? Yep. And, I wouldn’t have it any other way. You know why? Because as the world impressively implodes all around us, I am more comfortable in my own skin and God’s calling on my life than ever before. I know where my present and my future is: in eternity with Adonai. I have zero fear of death and no trepidation of what may come next in this world. In fact, I have already begun living His promised blessings of heaven. The intimacy I experience with Father, Son, and Holy Spirit is indescribable.
Are you hearing His call to the fire of purification? Good. Go for it. I promise it is the wisest decision you will ever make. It will save you. Even better, it will rescue multitudes of God’s lost children. Jesus wants to use you specifically for this last Kingdom harvest.
Jesus told me to tell you that He loves you deeply and dearly. He is asking you to grab ahold of His hand and walk with Him. The greatest name and love of all, Jehovah, is wanting you to break up with the world and abide in Him. The fire is the greatest gift after salvation. He promises.
Ready to Walk with You, EllieB
Psalm 18: 16
1 Peter 1:6-7